Doomed(注定的) beauties such as Cleopatra and Manilyn Monroe were far from alone in their misery(愁苦). Very attractive people tend to form partnerships(情侣关系) that are less stable and satisfying than those enjoyed by plain Janes.

According to research by Dr John Blaine of the UniversityofSouthern California, relationships between people whose professions largely depend on their appearances, such as models or actors, tend to end much faster than those between lawyers, doctors or students.

Blaine said the beautiful felt different from childhood. They are treated as special, which may create both arrogance(傲慢) and insecurity. All too often, beauty can be used as an alternative to education. Often they are pushed out of their class or town, told to go off and make their fortune in Hollywood or London and, when the majority fail, they have few talents(才能) to make a living.

Blaine added that beautiful people score poorly on the“big five”— the key factors American experts consider when helping distressed couples. These are neuroticism(神经过敏), including anger and anxiety; extroversion(性格外向); openness to new experiences; agreeableness; and conscientiousness, or sticking by agreements they have made. Attractive people often see no reason to try to change until their looks start to fade.

Krista Sutherland, of the University of California Los Angeles, said partnerships that appeared to be perfect from the outside, such as the former “dream teams” of Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise or Hugh Grant and Elizabeth Hurley, where backgrounds and aspirations(抱负) are often shared, did not necessarily lead to happiness.

Stress (压力) is everywhere in our daily life . And it is not just men who suffer from it, but women and young people , too.

The main causes of stress are : death, divorce , marriage, money, moving house, changing jobs, ending relationships and taking exams.

So how do you know if you suffer from stress ? Do the Stress Test and find out ! Stress Test(Yes or No)

1 Do you often sleep badly ?

2 get headaches a lot ?

3 find it difficult to relax ?

4 need alcohol or cigarettes to keep clam ?

5 usually hide your feeling ?

6 find it difficult to put your heart into something ?

7 take sleeping pills ?

8get angry when things go wrong ?

If you answer Yes to more than two of these questions, you are one of many people who suffer from stress. So what can you do about it ?

Doing yoga（瑜伽）or relaxation exercises, chewing gum and playing with worry

beads (念珠) are all common ways of relieving(减轻) stress. However doctors now say that there are simpler ways. Their advice is that people should laugh and smile more often. When you laugh and smile , your body relaxes. They also say that people and especially men ought to X more frequently, because crying is the natural way of relieving stress(释放压力).

According to the study, babies who get on well with their mothers are well behaved, patient and more mature. And these qualities give them a good future，the Science Daily reported.

“Most parents try their best to help the child in future development, and they want to build a positive and close relationship to get good results several years later，” says Grazyna from the University of Iowa, US.

For the study,102 mothers，fathers and babies had volunteered from the time the children were 7 months old until they were almost 4 and a half years old.

Children who had developed a close and positive relationship with their mothers in the first two years of their lives did much better and they have better behavior than children who hadnˈt developed such ties.

The researchers also studied how relationships between mothers and children worked. When mothers and babies develop this closeness in the first two years well，mothers donˈt need to use some rules later to get their children to do what they ask and refrain from other behaviors.

And in turn, the children can do better in the school later. Some of these findings were similar for fathers and children. Positive relationships between fathers and children in the first two years of life could also make children have better performance when the children were 4 and a half.

“Donˈt worry if you have problems!” It is easy to say until you are in the midst of a really big one. The only people who donˈt have troubles are gathered in little neighborhoods. Most communities have at least one. We call them cemeteries（墓地）. If youˈre breathing, you have difficulties. Itˈs the way of life. And believe it or not, most of your problems may actually be good for you! Let me explain. 

Maybe you have heard the Great Barrier Reef(大堡礁), stretching some 1,800 miles from New Guinea to Australia. Tour guides regularly take visitors to view the reef.

On one tour, a traveler asked the guide an interesting question. "I notice that the lagoon(环礁湖)side of the reef looks pale and lifeless, while the ocean side is vibrant(充满生气的) and colorful," the traveler observed. Why is this?

The guide gave an interesting answer, "The coral around the lagoon side is in still water, with no challenge for its survival. It dies early. The coral on the ocean side is constantly being tested by wind, waves and storms. It has to fight for its survival every day. As it is challenged and tested, it changes and adapts. It grows healthy. It grows strong. And it reproduces."

Then he added, “Thatˈs the way it is with every living organism.”

Thatˈs how it is with people. Challenged and tested, we come alive! Like coral pounded by the sea, we grow. Physical demands can cause us to grow stronger. Mental and emotional stress can produce tough-mindedness and resiliency（弹回）. Spiritual testing can produce strength of character and faithfulness. So, you have problems? No problem! Just tell yourself, "There I grow again!" 

Remember: A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner（水手）.

It is not only praise or punishment that determines a child’s level of confidence. There are some other important ways we shape our kids, particularly by giving instructions and commands in a negative or positive choice of words. For example, we can say to a child “Don’t run into traffic!” pr “Stay on the footpath close to me.” In using the latter, you will be helping your kids to think and act positively, and to feel competent in a wide range of situations, because they know what to do, and aren’t scaring themselves about what not to do.

 Why does such a small thing make a difference? It is all in the way the human mind works. What we think, we automatically rehearse (预演). For example, if someone offered you a million dollars not to think of a blue monkey for two minutes, you wouldn’t be able to do it. When a child is told “Don’t fall off the tree,” he will think of two things: “don’t” and “fall off the tree”. That is, he will automatically create the picture of falling off the tree in his mind. A child who is vividly imagining falling off the tree is much more likely to fall off. So it is far better to use “Hold on to the tree carefully.”

 Clear, positive instructions help kids to understand the right way to do things. Kids do not always know how to be safe, or how to react to the warning of the danger in negative words. So parents should make their commands positive. “Sam, hold on firm to the side of the boat” is much more useful than “Don’t you dare to fall out of the boat?” or worse still “How do you think I’ll feel if you drown?” The changes are small but the difference is obvious.

 Children learn how to guide and organize themselves from the way we guide them with our words, so it pays to be positive.

D

The word tolerance is widely used in liberal democracies. It indicates a positive meaning. Politicians urge us to be tolerant towards minorities. Educators teach us to be tolerant towards the other. The press is full of references to the need to display tolerance when faced with individuals or groups espousing a different view or holding a different religious belief. A tolerant society is an objective sought after by anyone who believes in the values of democracy. A tolerant individual is attributed with virtuous qualities.

The question we must ask is whether we have been using the word tolerance fully aware of its meaning and whether we have applied it correctly to reflect what we really wish to convey?

The word tolerance means to bear, or to bear with. If I tolerate something or someone, I basically say that I am ready to bear it or him. I can tolerate a bad smell or a noisy neighbor. The act of toleration forces me to desist from conveying my objection to the existence of a phenomenon, which I find difficult to bear. A bad smell or a noisy neighbor is considered by me to be an objectionable phenomenon. By tolerating either of them, I am not transforming the bad smell or the noisy neighbor into positive phenomena. Let's be honest: I don't have a different taste when it comes to bad smells. I simply dislike it and wish that it disappears. I don't respect the noisy neighbor. I would rather have him stop at once the noise he is making so I can live in peace.

To try to remove the bad smell or take reasonable action in order for the noisy neighbor to stop bothering me would most probably not be considered an intolerant act by most people.

Now, let's try to apply the word tolerance in reference to a person who is law-abiding and holds a legally acceptable different view from my own. I may have a strong view, which is opposed to his. Quite frankly, I may decide to tolerate his view. By so doing, I would be attributing to it a negative characteristic. I would apply the same attitude to his view as to the bad smell or noisy neighbor. Thus, to try to take action in order to make his view disappear would be considered an intolerant act. To tolerate his view the way I would a bad smell or a noisy neighbor, could hardly be considered virtuous.

The subject tolerating is by nature not equal to the object being tolerated. If I tolerate you, I essentially say that I am above you and am prepared, although unwillingly, to bear with your presence or with your practices or opinions. That may be true in the case of an individual who is ready to tolerate the other. However, this attitude by such an individual, though empirically true, is hardly a virtue. Certainly, the fact that an individual, in reality, may merely tolerate the other or his opinion does not justify a government or any official authority promoting tolerance as a virtue. One cannot tolerate an equal being. True equality involves respect, not toleration. To respect the other as a distinctive person is hardly to tolerate him. This is the true meaning of equality: diversity existing in a mutually-respectful socio-legal setting.

 The danger with tolerance is that it can lead to the acceptance of individuals or groups bent on destroying the foundations of democratic systems. We have seen such cases with regard to political parties or destructive religious groups that have been treated in a liberal manner under the guise of tolerance.

 A tolerant attitude involves the grant of a favor, not a right. The question we should ask ourselves is whether we would ever wish a parliament to make laws according to us, as individuals and as part of a collective entity or a permission to pursue certain actions interpreted as a favor rather than a right? Indeed, would we ever wish anyone to listen to our views and accept us the way we are simply because he is kind enough to tolerate us?

Daydreaming was viewed as a waste of time．Or it was considered an unhealthy escape from real life and its duties．Daydreaming has always had a bad reputation，but now scientific research has showed that daydreaming may actually improve your mental health and creativity．It can even help you achieve your desired goals．

Now some people are taking a fresh look at daydreaming．Some think it may be a very healthy thing to do．Researchers are finding daydreaming，they tell us，is a good means of relaxation．But its benefits go beyond this．A number of psychologists have conducted experiments and have reached some surprising conclusions．   

Dr．Joan T．Freyberg has concluded that daydreaming contributes to intellectual growth．It also improves concentration，attention span，and the ability to get along with others，she says．In an experiment with school children, the same researcher found that daydreaming led the children to pay more attention to details．They had more happy feelings．They worked together better．Another researcher reported that daydreaming seemed to produce improved self-control and creative abilities．

But that’s only part of the story．The most remarkable thing about daydreaming may be its usefulness in shaping our future lives as we want them to be．Industrialist Henry J．Kaiser believed that much of his success was due to the positive use of daydreaming．He maintained that “you can imagine your future．”Florence Nightingale dreamed of becoming a nurse．The young Thomas Edison pictured himself as an inventor. For these famous achievers，it appears that their daydreams came true．

Of course daydreaming is no substitute(代替者)for hard work．You have to work hard to develop skills．Daydreaming alone can’t turn you into your heart’s desire．But in，combination with the more usual methods of self-development，it might make a critical difference．And who knows：You might see your own daydreams come true．

Children’s lives have changed greatly over the last 50 years. But do they have a happier childhood than you or I did?

It’s difficult to look back on one’s own childhood without some element of nostalgia(怀旧的). I have four brothers and sisters, and my memories are all about being with them, playing board games on the living room floor, or spending days in the street with the other neighborh ood children, racing up and down on our bikes, or exploring the nearby woods. My parents scarcely appear in these memories, except as providers either of meals or of severe blame after some particularly risky adventure.

These days, in the UK at least, the nature of childhood has changed dramatically. Firstly, families are smaller. It is common for both parents to work outside the home and there is the feeling that there just isn’t time to bring up a large family, or that no one could possibly afford to have more than one child. As a result, today’s boys and girls spend much of their time alone. Another major change is that youngsters today tend to spend a huge amount of their free time at home, inside. This is due to the fact that parents worry far more than they used to about real or imagined dangers, so they wouldn’t dream of letting their children play outside by themselves.

Finally, the kind of toys children have and the way they play is totally different. Computer and video games have replaced the board games and more interesting activities of my childhood. The irony（讽刺）is that so many ways of playing games are called “interactive”. The fact that you can play electronic games on your own further increases the sense of loneliness felt by many young people today.

Do these changes mean that children today have a less relaxing childhood than I had? I personally believe that they do, but perhaps every generation feels exactly the same.

Having a tattoo(纹身) can reduce your chance of getting a job, but it depends on where the tattoo is, what it expresses and if the job involves dealing with customers, new research says.

Dr Andrew R Timming told the British Sociological Association conference on work, employment and society in Warwick today that employers were likely to view tattoos negatively. Dr Timming of the school of Management at the University of St Andrews said he had spoken to 15 managers involved in hiring staff about their reaction to interview candidates with visible tattoos.

"Most respondents agreed that visible tattoos are a stigma," Dr Timming told the conference. One woman manager told him that "they make a person look dirty." Another male manager told him "subconsciously that would stop me from employing them." The managers were concerned about what their organisations' customers might think, said Dr Timming. "Hiring managers realise that, ultimately, it does not matter what they think of tattoos -- what really matters, instead, is how customers might think of employees with visible tattoos.

Dr Timming said: "The one qualification to this argument is there are certain industries in which tattoos may be a desirable characteristic in a job interview. For example, an HR manager at a prison noted that tattoos on guards can be something to talk about and an in that you need to make a connection with the prisoners."

The negative attitude to tattoos did not extend to ones that could be easily covered by clothing. Dr Timming also found that in some of the organisations it was only certain types of tattoos that diminished the chances of getting a job at interview. One male manager told him: "If it's gang culture-related you may have a different view about the tattoo than if it's just because it's a nice drawing of an animal that they've done on their arm."

Kong Zi , also called Confucius (551-479 B.C) , and Socrates (469-399 B. C) lived only a hundred years apart , and during their lifetimes there was no contact between China and Greece, but it is interesting to look at how the world that each of these great philosophers came from shaped their ideas , and how these ideas in turn ,shaped their societies.

Neither philosopher lived in times of peace, though there were more wars in Greece than in China. The Chinese states were very large and feudal, while the Greek city-states were small and urban. The urban environment in which Socrates lived allowed him to be more radical than Confucius. Unlike Confucius, Socrates was not asked by rules how to govern effectively. Thus, Socrates was able to be more idealistic, focusing on issues like freedom, and knowledge for its own sake. Confucius, on the other hand, advised those in government service, and many of his students went out to government service.

Confucius suggested the Golden Rule as a principle for the conduct of life:” Do not do to others what you would not want others to do to you.” He assumed that all men were equal at birth, though some had more potential than others, and that it was knowledge that set men apart. Socrates focused on the individual, and thought that the greatest purpose of man was to seek wisdom. He believed that the superior class should rule the inferior(下层的)classes.

For Socrates, the family was of no importance, and the community of little concern. For Confucius, however, the family was the centre of the society, with family relations considered much more important than political relations.

Both men are respected much more today than they were in their lifetimes.