A scientist turns out to be able to see the future by offering each of some four-year-olds a piece of candy and watching how he or she deals with it. Some children reach eagerly for the treat they see. Some last a few minutes before they give in. But others are determined to wait until the last moment. By the time the children reach high school, something remarkable has happened. A survey found that those who as four-year-olds had enough self-control to hold out generally grew up to be more popular, adventurous, confident and dependable. The children who gave in to temptation(诱惑) early on were more likely to be lonely, easily frustrated(沮丧)and inflexible(固守己见的). Actually, the ability to delay reward is a sign of emotional intelligence which doesn't show up on an IQ test.

The hardware of the brain and the software of the mind have long been scientists' concerns. But brain theory can't explain what we wonder about most, like the question why some people remain upbeat in the face of troubles that would sink a less resistant soul. Here comes the theory of Daniel Goleman, writer of Emotional Intelligence: when it comes to predicting people's success, brain ability as measured by IQ may actually matter less than the qualities of mind once thought of as "character".

EQ is not the opposite of IQ. What researchers have been trying to understand is how they work together; how one's ability to handle stress, for instance, affects the ability to concentrate and put intelligence to use. Among the ingredients(要素) for success, researchers now generally agree that IQ counts for about 20%; the rest depends on everything from social class to luck.

While many researchers in this relatively new field are glad to see emotional issues finally taken seriously, some few fear EQ invites misuse.

Most of the time, people wear hats to protect themselves from harsh weather conditions. Hats are also worn to show politeness and as signs of social position. But nowadays, hats, especially women's hats, are much more than that. More exactly, hats have changed into fashion and style symbols by many movie stars. What's more, people now consider many different features(特点) when choosing even a simple hat. Many designers point out that, when choosing the right hat, it's important to consider the color of your skin as well as your hair, your height, and the shape of your face.

First of all, the color of the hat should match the color of your skin and hair. For instance, black hats should be avoided if you are dark skinned. If a purple hat is placed on top of red hair, one will look as attractive as a summer flower. Second, the height of the hat is also an important point. Tall women should not go for hats with tall crowns, just as short women should choose hats with upturned brims to give the look of height. Third, and most importantly, the shape of the face decides the kind of hat one should pick. A small, gentle hat that fits the head looks good on a small face. However, women with big, round faces should choose a different style.

As the saying goes, "Fine feathers make fine birds." A good hat can not only help your dress but also support your features, so why not choose the best possible one next time you want to be in public?

Until late in the 20th century, most Americans spent time with people of generations. Now mid-aged Americans may not keep in touch with old people until they are old themselves. That’s because we group people by age. We put our three-year-olds together in day-care center, our 13-year-olds in school and sports activities, and our 80-year-olds in senior-citizen homes. Why?

We live away from the old for many reasons: young people sometimes avoid the old to get rid of fears for aging and dying. It is much harder to watch .someone we love disappear before our eyes. Sometimes it’s so hard that we stay away from the people who need us most.

Fortunately, .some of us have found our way to the old. And we have discovered that they often save the young.

A reporter moved her family onto a block filled with old people. At first her children were disappointed. But the reporter baked banana bread for the neighbours and had her children deliver it and visit. Soon the children had many new friends, with whom they shared food, stories and projects. “My children have never been less lonely,” the reporter said.

The young, in turn, save the old. Once I was in a rest home when a visitor showed up with a baby. She was immediately surrounded. People who hadn’t gotten out of bed in a week suddenly were ringing for a wheelchair. Even those who had seemed asleep wake up to watch the child. Babies have an astonishing power to comfort and cure.

Grandparents are a special case. They give grandchildren a feeling of security and continuity. As my husband put it, “my grandparents gave me a deep sense that things would turn out right in the end.”

Grandchildren speak of attention they don’t get from worried parents. “My parents were always telling me to hurry up, and my grandparents told me to slow down,” one friend said. A teacher told me she can tell which pupils have relationships with grandparents: they are quieter, calmer, more trusting.